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    Saturday, January 31, 2009

    Feed My Ego

    Moving my Twitter feed to the top of the blog - I spend much more time there these days than I do here. Follow me! FOLLOW ME!

    Friday, January 30, 2009

    You Tube Fun Rascal Flatts Edition

    Feels Like Today

    I'm Movin On

    These Days

    Bless The Broken Road


    Life Is A Highway

    Friday, January 23, 2009

    You Tube Fun - Joni Mitchell Version

    Circle Game

    Free Man In Paris

    In France They Kiss On Main Street

    Raised On Robbery

    Tuesday, January 20, 2009

    More Things You Don't Expect To Hear Rachel Ray Say

    "Today I'm going to show you how to create an entire menu based on your nuts."

    Friday, January 16, 2009

    You Tube Fun - Mostly Delbert McClinton Version

    B-Movie Box Car Blues

    Giving It Up For Your Love

    Two More Bottles of Wine

    Never Can Tell

    Monday, January 12, 2009

    Most Annoying People of 2008

    The Buffalo Beast's annual list of the most annoying people has been released. Some samples:

    Frank Caliendo

    Exhibit A: His TBS vehicle, "Frank TV," is the least amusing thing to appear on television since the morning of September 11, 2001.

    Sarah Palin

    In the end, Palin had the beneficial effect of splitting her party between her admirers and people who can read.

    Friday, January 09, 2009

    You Tube Fun - Elvin Bishop Version

    Travellin Shoes

    Fooled Around and Fell in Love

    Struttin My Stuff

    Sunday, January 04, 2009

    You Tube Mood Music


    Love Has No Pride

    Dimming Of The Day

    My Opening Farewell (ignore the video, just listen to the music)

    The Last Time I Saw Richard (couldn't find a video)

    The last time I saw Richard was Detroit in 68 and he told me
    All romantics meet the same fate someday 
    Cynical and drunk and boring someone in some dark cafe
    You laugh he said you think you're immune 
    Go look at your eyes they're full of moon
    You like roses and kisses and pretty men to tell you 
    All those pretty lies 
    Pretty lies
    When you gonna realize they're only pretty lies
    Only pretty lies 
    Just pretty lies

    He put a quarter in the Wurlitzer and he pushed three buttons 
    And the thing began to whirr 
    And a bar maid came by in fishnet stockings and a bow tie
    And she said "Drink up now it's gettin' on time to close" 
    "Richard, you haven't really changed" I said 
    It's just that now you're romanticizing some pain that's in your head 
    You got tombs in your eyes but the songs you punched are dreaming
    Listen, they sing of love so sweet, 
    Love so sweet
    When you gonna get yourself back on your feet? 
    Oh and love can be so sweet 
    Love so sweet

    Richard got married to a figure skater and he bought her a dishwasher 
    And a coffee percolator 
    And he drinks at home now most nights with the TV on 
    And all the house lights left up bright
    I'm gonna blow this damn candle out
    I don't want nobody comin' over to my table
    I got nothing to talk to anybody about 
    All good dreamers pass this way some day 
    Hidin' behind bottles in dark cafes dark cafes 
    Only a dark cocoon before I get my gorgeous wings and fly away 
    Only a phase these dark cafe days

    Bitter Thoughts

    I've been home now for about two hours, having flown to Baltimore and back to take the boys home after Christmas break. If I'm being absolutely honest, it hurts more to see E go than to see Andrew go. I love them both, but E spends more time with me, and as such has grown a lot closer to me. It works both ways, too. E clearly feels more pain when we part (and when he and Lesa part, when he comes to be with me) than Andrew does. 

    My day began yesterday at 7:30 am, so I'm pushing 30 hours awake. We flew out yesterday afternoon, getting to Baltimore around 11:30 pm. We made our goodbyes, and I returned to the airport. My return flights were scheduled to begin at 6:10 am, and I was hoping to get checked in and back to my gate, but security was closed. So I checked in and wandered around til I found the 24 hour Subway. I got a sandwich, and sat there reading comics for about two hours. I then got up, wandered to a different area, and sat there reading comics til Security opened at 4:00 am. I then made my way back to the gate, waited for my flights, and made it back uneventfully, a nice change from when I got the boys. 

    You start thinking some awfully dark thoughts about the direction your life has taken when you're sitting in the 24-hour Subway at BWI at 2:00 in the morning. You start to really feel the pain of your son being gone. But you push it back, cause you don't want it. Not there, not then. 

    But it keeps coming back, no matter how hard you push, and at some point you relent. And so now, right now, the pain of E being gone washes over me and the tears flow unashamedly and I hurt, I just hurt so much and it's a pain that doesn't go away, it just eventually gets bearable. Hell, I bet I'm down to crying just twice a day by the end of the week!

    I work with people who joke about how they would give their kids away. I'm sure you've heard jokes like that. Maybe you've made them. But I don't laugh, and they know now not to make those jokes around me, because the pain is just 




    You are supposed to eventually see your children on their way away from you, but you don't expect to have to start doing it when they are 4. And it doesn't get easier. If anything, it gets worse, because each time he's gone he grows a little more, he takes a few more steps down the path to becoming the man he is going to be, and I don't get to see those steps. 

    And there are no answers. I think at this point we can safely say that L and I can't live together, no matter how much we might love each other. We just can't live together. And yet, it may take some sort of drastic restructuring of my life to be able to be with him more often. Because as much as I want to, and sometimes do, blame her for us being here, I don't want her to miss out either. 

    Fuck, life sucks sometimes. 

    (Note: I intentionally turned off comments for this post. I hate when I'm the guest of honor at a pity party, but I needed to say that stuff.)

    Adios, Bill

    You were a helluva guy, Bill Gerlits. One helluva a crazy old coot. I wonder if I should mention at the memorial service how you used to joke that after you died, you wanted to be stuffed and put in the lobby at ICCT with show programs in your hands.

    One quick thing to add to this - community theatres are full of diverse people with diverse personalities, many of whom are unable to get along with each other. I've heard nasty comments about everyone I ever worked with on a show or as President. Everyone, that is, but Bill. Everyone who got to know him liked Bill. Sure, some people found the ring thing a little goofy, although they always still touched the ring. But everyone liked him. I never heard a harsh word from anyone about Bill.